Pnd? him? me? or something else?

ok here goes sorry if it dont all make sense im just trying to get it straight in my head aswel. we have been married for just over 2 years im 20 hes 25 and we have 7 month old twins, since i found out i was pregnant we both lost jobs and now stuck in 2nd floor flat with no lift. well prob we seem to be having is that we always arguing i dont know if all the stress has got to me and i have pnd or what but i have not had even half a day to myself out with anymates since my girls were born he goes out for diff things not anything like pub but does go out on his own and i just feel like im left to do everything on own he wont help and moans when i keep going at him to get it done he calls me names and makes nasty remarks bout me 2 girls and to me he says things like mummy dnt want you if i ask him keep eye on them for half hour or mummy dont want look after you and keeps saying im crazy and stuff i know i get realy stressed and lately im just crying alot but i feel as though im just banging my head agenst a brick wall am i being unreasonable asking him to help with there care and expecting him to look after them on his own and with housework? i dont know what to think anymore his family keep telling me i have pnd and i didnt think i had and i got checked but now i just seem to cry so easily and feel so stressed all time and dont know how to clm down and get so i feel normal again and i feel like i missing ut on quality time with my girls cause i doing everything else so by time i doe all that and done all feeding and everything its then time for bed am i in wrong or not? i just need some straight answers thankyou and sorry if it not very clear|||Wow you really have your hands full. You could have pnd or your sadness could be caused by your situation. Being stuck in a little flat with two babies and no help would make anyone feel crazy! When his family tells you you have pnd do they offer any help or support? Have you talked to your midwife about how you feel? Did she think you have pnd or more stress from being 20 years old and too much stress?





Will your or your husbands family take the girls for a short time so you can get a break? Even a few hours will make you feel so much better and more clear headed. I know this would only be a short term fix, you still have somethings to take care of, but I think if you could breathe for a few hours your world would feel a whole lot better.





Another thing that would be wonderful for you to do would be relaxation techniques, there are discs available with recordings of a running river, ocean sounds, storms. Whatever you feel would be relaxing to listen to, I bought one with my last pregnancy and I would play it while I nursed or if I felt too stressed to sleep. Just close your eyes and listen and picture yourself in a forest (that was my favorite) pretty soon I could just close my eyes and I was out! Then my 10 year old daughter started doing the same and we both felt much better! I could always get my baby to go to sleep by playing it at her nap-time too!





Do you have any friends close by who have babies? Or even friends close by who don't have a baby but would like to help you out for a few hours? Having another person your own age to talk to and an extra pair of hands so you don't have to juggle 2 babies all the time! Or are there any young teens in your building who would like to play with the babies at your place, while you get things done in the house, so you don't feel like you are neglecting them while you clean some dishes or bottles.





A friend told me she would do 15 minutes of picking up, she just did as much as she could do with 15 minutes time and then 15 minutes of play with her baby.|||its both of you. my daughter is 2.5 and i rarely get any time to myself to even do the laundry much less actually enjoy friends alone.





get checked for pnd. i had it and its very serious!|||You are just stressed out, and i understand what your talking about when the daddy does not help out, i am basically in the same boat, and no your rigth to ask, i only have one baby i couldn't emagine having to. he should be helping more and not ***** about it, you where not the only one who made those two wonderful lives. You should when the babies are sleeping sit down and have an important talk to him, tell him that you need the help and how he can help you. and just poor your heart out ask him to listen because it will help you. Good Luck and congrats on yoru twins!!|||Hun i have seen so many questions of your about this same thing, My advice too you is either tell him how you are feeling to get off his butt and help you and your babies or get the hell out, he is lazy nasty and not much of a Dad from what i can gather from your posts, I have twins as well and i know how hard it is i also had clinical depression after i had them and my partner had our twins alone for 4 weeks while i got over the depression when i went back home he went out the same day and got a job, low paid but even so he was working. Sit him down tell him or i would talk to the Samaritans you can email them privately i did this when i was having problems with My partner and the stress of having a disabled twin, they will advise you on everything even housing ...best of luck be strong !